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Brad Staplin
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How Badly Do You Want It and What Are You Willing To Give Up To Get It?

April 27, 2023

man holding money bags

I remember when I passed the test and got my license 20 years ago, I was excited with the anticipation of what was to come. I had these dreams of being the top dog someday, having a huge home with acreage, a home at the beach, and a home in Tahoe. I would have lots of people working for me so I could just check in on my business a couple of days a week. Having come from management positions in the retail industry we all had the “whatever it takes” attitude and that’s what I was going to bring to my real estate career.

To get my career started I wanted to learn from the best, so I answered an ad, (we had these things called newspapers back then), from a top agent at REMAX who needed a buyer’s agent. I went to the interview and he told me that not long ago he was the top seller in the office and the top 2 or 3 in the entire area. He said he had some setbacks but is now ready to get going again and wants to grow his business even larger than it was. I was intrigued, this is exactly what I was looking for, a top seller who wants to bring me in on the ground floor of rebuilding his business!

Then I asked him what the setback was. He said, “Oh, I went through a terrible divorce and just about lost everything. I had the biggest house, best cars, and was raking in the cash. Then she divorced me and took nearly everything, even the kids. But I kept going, and didn’t let that affect my business, I was still killing it! Then I had a damn heart attack, a bad one. It nearly killed me! I couldn’t work, so I lost everything I had left from the divorce. I’ve been really unlucky the past few years, but now I’m back! I’m healthy and ready to build my business so It’s even bigger than before. I can make sure you have more business than you know what to do with!”

I left that interview with every intention of working for him. But after talking with my wife and considering his circumstances, I didn’t feel comfortable being the guy that was going to do everything he didn’t want to do. So, I found a REMAX closer to home and struck out on my own. I think about that interview often, especially after my life change in 2016. Looking back, I am positive that I made the right decision. Yep, I could have had instant business and probably could have made a lot more money than I did in the beginning. But what would I have had to sacrifice? Would I have ended up “unlucky” like him?

I didn’t see back then that he wasn’t unlucky, he created that world. I don’t know what his wife or family life was like, but I do know now that being the top dog typically means a great deal of sacrifice. I kept track of him over the years and he did build his business back up. He was the top dog again, but then he just disappeared. I don’t know what happened to him, but I think I know. I think he was eaten up by chasing more, more, more. Maybe he just got burned out and quit, hopefully, he’s living in a quiet beach community counting his money. But I don’t think so, my gut is telling me that he paid the ultimate price for what he perceived as success. I know that mentality,(I had it until 2016), the ‘whatever it takes” mentality. Thankfully, I now see that there is nothing more important than my family, my friends, and my health.

I’m sure as you read this, some of you think this will never happen to you. You have “balance” in your life. I suggest that you really don’t have balance, because there is no such thing. If you really dig down and be honest with yourself, are your business and your personal life equal at all times? It’s impossible to balance anything perfectly for an extended period of time, especially a business that demands as much time as ours when you are the top dog. Once you accept that it’s ok to have imbalance in your life, will you see that what you thought was balance was actually justification in your mind to keep chasing more, more, more. The critical part of living life unbalanced is to ensure that the most important things in your life are always the priority. It’s up to you to determine what those priorities are, then take action to tilt the scales in favor of them.

So the next time you think about how great it would be to be the top salesperson in your office, your area, the state, or on earth, ask yourself, “What am I willing to give up to obtain that?” You may be surprised at how your dreams may change and your gratitude for what you currently have will grow. You will also be surprised that once you start Living Life Unbalanced, your business will also grow. The clarity that it brings will attract the kind of business that allows you to live the life you want to live. Maybe not the life you dreamed of when you got your license, but perhaps an even better one.

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Brad Staplin

I'm a business-life coach helping real estate professionals run efficient businesses that not only preserves, but prioritizes, time for the people and experiences you care about most. Contact Brad

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